The Official Unhemmed Baseball Drinking Game

There are few things better on Summer afternoon or evening than watching a ballgame with your boys—especially if you’re actually watching from stadium seats instead of your couch. With that, we’re back at it again with another in our ongoing series of express stops to inebriation. Treat yourself to a game with the dudes, buy some tickets, and play our Official Unhemmed Baseball Drinking Game with your friends at the ballpark. The only things you’ll need once you’re there are beers, peanuts, and a high tolerance for booze.

Set Up:
1. Find family members or friends amenable to getting a little drunk while at the game.
2. Make sure you all have a ride home. (Designated drivers or public transportation are strongly encouraged.)
3. Agree upon which of the following rules you’re all playing by. Feel free to focus on just one or play all fifteen.
4. Get beers for everyone playing.

1. Team Taste: Every player starts by picking their team. Whenever that team scores, all other players who did not pick that team have to take a sip of their beer.

2. Ballplayer Boozin’: In addition to picking a team, every player must also pick a ballplayer. Whenever that ballplayer is up to bat, if he gets on base, all other players must take a sip of their beer, but if he doesn’t get on base, the player who chose him must take a sip of their beer.

3. Three Sips You’re Out in the Old Ball Game: You know the song and you know the rules: three strikes and you’re out. If the ballplayer chosen by a player strikes out, then that player must take three sips of their beer, one for each strike.

4. Some Homerun Fun: It’s always more fun if there are homeruns—especially if you’re forced to drink every time one happens. Every player must slam their beer if a homerun is hit by either team.

5. A Slurp for Your Section: If a foul ball is hit to your section of the stands, every player must take a sip of their beer. (If one of the players catches the foul ball, they do not have to take a sip, but the rest of the players have to gulp down their entire beer.)

6. Swill for a Steal: For every stolen base, every player must take a sip of their beer. And you better take that sip fast because the last player to take a sip has to take one long three-second swill of their beer.

7. Hey Bladder Bladder: If a player is in the bathroom during any sip they should have to take, they have to take double of whatever their drink count should have been.

8. Peanut Up or Shut Up: Get yer peanuts here! When the peanut guy comes around to your section, every player who is not buying peanuts must take two sips of their beer. Buying peanuts exempts you from these sips.

9. Beer Bunt: If a ballplayer bunts, the first player to shout “beer bunt” gets to choose a person to down the rest of the beer.

10. Double Play Doubles Play: After a double play, anything that happens in the two minutes following a double play incurs double the drink penalty.

11. Triple Play Triples Play: After a triple play, anything that happens in the three minutes following a triple play incurs triple the drink penalty.

12. Seventh Inning Quaff: During the seventh inning stretch, all players must chug the rest of their beer and get another.

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