It's official: you're the chosen one. Like Luke Skywalker and Neo from the Matrix before you, you۪ve got a lot of responsibilities ahead of you.
Being picked as the best man is not only a huge honor but it also conveys a level of trust the groom has in you that۪s important to consider. As the saying goes though, with great power, comes great responsibility. To help you along in your quest, we۪ve got all the advice you۪ll need on how to party, dress, toast, entertain, and generally prepare for the groom۪s big day. After all, there۪s lots of great men, but you۪re the best man.
Herd The Cats
As the best man, a good chunk of your wedding duties will revolve around coordinating, ok let۪s face it, herding, the groomsmen. From assisting the groom with wedding attire coordination to cracking the whip on attendees, keeping the team organized is important. The groom۪s got plenty on his mind so help a brother out and corral the fellas and make sure they۪ve got their sartorial assignments in check and handled.
Plan The Party
Keep in mind, this is not an opportunity for you to take full, creative license. At the end of the day, er weekend, it۪s a time to celebrate the groom-to-be and your job is to ensure your group is doing what he wants for the weekend. It۪s really about striking a balance between being a planner and a full-blown host. Get prepared early, you don۪t want to wait until the last minute, and then spring the idea of a destination party on everyone with no time to plan. Consider the budgets, travel plans, and wedding timeline when locking in a location. Speaking of locations, sure, Vegas is great, but there are a ton of other places too. Need more inspiration? Check out our handy guide to some of our favorite bachelor party destinations.
The Rehearsal Dinner
Usually, planning duties are covered so you can relax and have a drink. Your speech will occur later of course, but you can always coordinate other groomsmen who want to say a few words at the dinner. Other key duties? Make sure the groom۪s drink is always full and the couple is relaxed and enjoying themselves.
Before The Ceremony
Before the ceremony kicks off, make a final checklist to ensure all your bases are covered. The day is going to be hectic and stressful so your job is to make sure you۪re doing everything you can to help organize the wedding party and make sure people arrive on-time and prepared. This is also the perfect time to make sure the groom is delivered to the venue early--preferably sober--and everyone is dressed and accessorized properly, including, ties, vests, and shoes (hopefully?). Of course, you also want to make sure the ring is in a safe place, and by "safe place" we don't mean on your finger. You۪ll have plenty of time to kill so you should see to it that the group is not only present and accounted for but also relaxed. Coordinating lunch, if necessary, or at the very least, a cooler of ice-cold beer and a large tv will be much appreciated. While we۪re not saying encouraging a few rounds of pre-ceremony flip cup with the bridesmaids are a good idea, we۪re definitely not saying it۪s a bad idea either.
Now that the hard part is over, you can finally let loose a little and enjoy the reason why most people are in attendance. The reception is where your role switches from planner to host, so act accordingly. Smooze, charm, eat and drink your way through the crowd, while always keeping an ear out for whatever the new couple needs. This is also a good opportunity to touch base with the maid of honor, in the event you need to coordinate on any emergency situations. Or, perhaps, some not-so-emergency situations, but important situations nonetheless. Be sure to save a good bit of energy (read: sobriety) for the toast and speeches, the second-most important part of the night, behind presenting the ring. Keep it short, funny, and above all, sweet. For more speech-giving tips, be sure to check out our primer "How To Make A Toast".
Aside from taking care of your first child or figuring out how to stock your first bar cart, being the best man is a huge responsibility, so make sure to put your best foot forward leading up to the first day of the rest of your friend۪s life.