The Spring Movie Preview

Hollywood has finally recovered from its award season hangover (although you know Leo is still living it up with models and bottles — #PussyPosse4life) and is set to release some movies that actually don’t suck. Spring time is when the movie studios ramp back up again, giving us indie darlings from the festival circuit, raunchy comedies and a defining big budget blockbuster to kick-off the summer movie season.

“Hardcore Henry” (April 8)
What’s It About: The story about an amnesiac cyborg brought back to life to save his wife is as ludicrous as it sounds, but that’s not what’s important. Who needs plot when you get to live vicariously through the eyes of a super soldier who kicks ass, shoots guns, jumps out of helicopters and gets to hang with Sharlto Copley of District 9 fame.

Why You Should Watch It: This first-person shooter, video-game-in-movie form is not the first (remember the Rock’s lame Doom?) and certainly will not be the last as the online buzz is that Hardcore Henry will usher in a new genre of filmmaking similar to the found footage trend that The Blair Witch Project started. Either way, this innovative POV style is going to redefine how you want to watch action movies forever.

Green Room (April 15)
What’s It About: Written and directed by Jeremy Saulnie, who came out of nowhere with Blue Ruin (check it out on Netflix), this horror-thriller pits a in-the-wrong-place-at-the-wrong-time punk rock band against murderous white supremacists led by Sir Patrick Stewart.

Why You Should Watch It: If Professor X or Captain Picard (for you Trekkies) playing a diabolical skinhead club owner isn’t enough of a draw for you, the movie’s insane trailer set in backwoods Oregon, looks wickedly fun and brilliantly crafted. But it’s the fact that it is grounded in riveting reality that will have you shaking in your combat boots.

Everybody Wants Some (April 15)
What’s It About: This ‘80s set, “spiritual sequel” to Richard Linklater’s cult favorite, Dazed and Confused, and follow-up to his Academy Award-nominated, Boyhood, has the Austin auteur’s trademark ‘Merican heart and humor as it follows a college baseball team’s wild weekend.

Why You Should Watch It: Linklater is a master storyteller of the male coming-of-age tale. He knows what men-to-be want (girls, good times) and how guys think, which makes this the perfect mash up of partying, comedy, and a bit of heart.

Keanu (April 29)
What’s It About: Taking its comedy cues from Keanu Reeves’ bloody fantastic John Wick, this hilarious parody stars your favorite TV comedy duo, Keegan-Michael Key and Jordan Peele, as two cat-loving cousins who must navigate their way through gang territory to rescue their kidnapped kitty.

Why You Should Watch It: If you’re still hurting over the tragic and sudden end of Comedy Central’s Key & Peele show (pass the Kleenex), this action-comedy starring the dynamic comedy duo and the always funny Will Forte will turn that frown upside down.

Captain America: Civil War (May 6)
What’s It About: The 2016 summer blockbuster movie season officially starts with this superhero family drama pitting our favorite masked Avengers against one another. It’s like a Memorial Day barbecue gone wrong. Did Hulk take the last hot dog? You never want to see Hulk “hangry.”

Why You Should Watch It: The Avengers have defeated villains from New York to outer space so it’s only natural that their next opponent would be themselves. Inspired by Mark Millar’s popular and controversial storyline from the comics, this Marvel-ous battle royal pits Captain America against Iron Man in the main draw. Let’s get ready to rumble!!!

The Nice Guys (May 20)
What’s It About: Set in smoggy and smutty 1970s Los Angeles, this California noir mystery teams up a down on his luck private eye and a for-hire enforcer who team up to solve a murder case involving a porn star. (Editor’s Note: The Fluffer did it!!!)

Why You Should Watch It: Writer/director Shane Black virtually created the buddy cop action-comedy genre with his Lethal Weapon series and now Black is back with Gosling and Russell Crowe as a possibly hilarious odd couple decked out in outlandish 70’s era costuming.